I must be the owner of the only pacifist cat, either that or she’s convinced herself that she’s a Good Samaritan.

Friday night Himself went to bed first and as per norm shut the bedroom window. Of course, only to be expected, before I went to bed I re-opened it. Come three in the morning I saw the error of my ways.

The cat, bless her, had brought a mouse in and let it go in the bedroom. I was woken by her jumping around. The minute I turned the light on the pair of them stopped and looked at me, the mouse obviously decided that it didn’t like what it saw and shot off under the bed. The cat did nothing what-so-ever to stop its escape; in fact she turned around and walked out of the room with her tail in the air. Apparently I'm a right spoil sport.

Himself wasn’t best pleased to be woken with the news of an unexpected house guest, and was even more annoyed when I made him get up to help me move the bed. We then spent the best part of half an hour moving the bedroom furniture around whilst the cat got comfy and went to sleep on the chair in the computer room. She assured us that it was nothing to do with her, it was raining outside and she’d just offered it some shelter from the storm.

We didn’t find the mouse, but I did find my glasses. Bit annoying that as I’d paid the optician an arm and a leg for another pair. They were underneath the bedside table along with a crossword book, a pen and rather a lot of dust, heaven knows how they got there. And considering I first reported my glasses missing late last year, it also tells you how often I move the bedroom furniture when hoovering upstairs.

In the end we gave in and got back into bed, we had to get up early on Saturday to help with the wedding arrangements, so the mouse got left to spend the night in the dry. Lying there I got an ear bashing from Himself on the whys and wherefores of leaving the window closed; when was I going to learn? At the very least I should have known to just leave the window on the catch so the cat couldn’t get in, I knew what she was like after all – it was a miracle that the house wasn't over run with the bloody things. I don’t know why he bothered; it wasn’t as if I was listening. I was too busy trying to pick up any sounds the mouse might be making.

Come Saturday morning there was still no sign of the mouse, so Himself shut the cat in the bedroom – she could bloody well look for it whilst we were out, he said. Of course the cat took about as much notice of Himself’s orders as I do. When we returned that afternoon she hadn’t moved from her spot on the bed. So the mouse spent the day exploring the room, no doubt making a mental note to complain about the amount of dust to be found behind the furniture.

The cat eventually showed an interest in the house guest in the early hours of Sunday morning. I woke to hear her doing that ‘my mouth is full, wake up quickly’ meow that she does. This time she wanted to take it back outside; it had out stayed its welcome, she said.

Unfortunately just for once I’d done as Himself had told me and left the window closed. This led to the cat jumped up on to the window sill and banging her head on the glass. Well, she’s come to expect the window to open at a push.

She dropped the mouse, which then fell down behind the radiator and landed in the shoebox containing Himself’s best shoes. He’d left the box on the floor and had just shoved his shoes back in it when we’d returned home after enjoying several celebratory drinks. I must say I was surprised at how quickly I reacted by slamming the lid back on the box, who says alcohol slows your reactions.

I then got dressed. Yes, even I learn from previous mistakes sometimes. The mouse got carried downstairs in the box with the shoes and the cat made sure that I knew she was most put out. She should have done that, she said, it was her friend not mine.

I walked across the road and tipped the contents of the box into the grass. It was one of those moments that I’d have killed for my camera. The mouse sat in Himself's shoe obviously wondering just what the hell was going on. I had to tip it out in the end.